Confessions of a Lifeguard


With possibly one of the most recognisable work uniforms, those red and yellow warriors seem to have a pretty dreamy job sitting down all day. Although, like every job it has it’s woes, we’ve put together some problems that are all too true when it comes to lifeguarding.

1.Forgetting to tell customers to bring their floats to the side of the pool when fun swim finishes.
Robson Green Extreme Fishing eat your heart out!

2. The awkward moment when you have to mop the changing room floor to find that someone is in the cubicle with the drain in.


3. Not recognising regulars in everyday clothing.
“Oh sorry I didn’t recognise you with a shirt on..”

4. When there is only one swimmer in the pool and you’re hoping they can read your mind and leave already.


5. Lanes = pain.
Getting people to move out the way when lanes go in is an impossible task. Then someone will always do a tumble turn and create a tidal wave *breathe*.

6. Not to mention putting lanes in with a newbie and knowing there is a high chance they are going to pull you in the pool.

7.When you’ve just done leg day in the gym and you have to face the high chair ladder…

8. And that one look you give to kids before they do something wrong.

9. Going for a swim on your day off and getting persuaded into doing a shift.
*Please don’t see me, please don’t see me*


10. You are almost guaranteed to have an intimate relationship with a fellow co-worker.
Because all lifeguards look like the Hoff and Pamela Anderson… right?

11. Doing a litter pick outside because its over 20 degrees.

12. Especially when it’s 40 degrees on poolside.

13. “It’s raining so much outside, I didn’t need to come for a swim today.” – Said every customer ever.
Oh you joker you, haven’t heard that one before.

14.Trying to explain to customers how the pool temperature works, trust me, it’s the same temperature as yesterday!

15.Often have to refrain shouting at people in the pool whilst you’re on holiday
“NO BOM- Oh wait… holiday pool, please proceed”

16. The feeling of walking around with a whistle and radio never gets old.

17.Realising that actually Lifeguarding is a great job.
You get to work with some of your best friends, you are highly respected and you are capable of becoming someone else’s hero. Maybe it’s not so bad after all!


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